Hands Off

Assuming that all goes well, this is the last day of my left hand’s vacation.

(Before you go there, I’m right handed.  So get your mind out of the gutter…so there’s more room for mine.)

My appointment with the super-duper hand doc is tomorrow at 8:15 – as per Dys’s standing suggestion, we’re getting in early before they have time to get all backed up.  Dys insists on going with me, mostly I think so she can hear with her own ears what the doc tells me I can and can’t do so I can’t come home and say that, yes, in fact, he did say it was just fine for me to enter the World’s Strongest Man competition this month.  But also partially so she can watch him pull the stitches out and watch me like a hawk to see if I’ll wince.  (She still feels ripped off that I barely made a face when I got tattooed.)

So I’m hoping that around 8:30 the cast comes off, at 8:35 Dys takes pictures of the stitches, and at 8:40 the stitches come out.

And at 8:45, I wash my fucking hands.  Gawd.

Sorry.

Afterward I’m sure the doc will grab my thumb like a six-month-old baby and tell me to move it this way and that way and he’ll hmm and nod and tell me what I get to look forward to for the next several months in terms of recovery and/or physical therapy.

Then I’ll go home, drop Dys off, and go to work with both my hands.  Then later, when I get home, I’ll take a long, hot shower without a garbage bag and scrub the hell out of both arms.  And in the morning I’ll finally shave my head in the shower again and stop butchering myself in front of the sink.

And so tomorrow, and Thursday, already look like great days to me.

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6 Responses

  1. Imagine how much it would suck to be in a full body cast for, say, six months???

    Oh, fuck, I don’t even want to think about it!

  2. I make no flinchies when I get tattooed or pierced, but I DO flinch when people on tv get punched and stuff. Go figure.

    Hope all goes well with the doc!

    Me too!

    Depending on the person, I may cheer when they get punched. Heh.

  3. Good luck with tomorrow’s appointment! 🙂

    Thanks, Romes!

  4. Oooh, good luck! Yay for being a fully functioning two handed person again (did that sound dirty? I think it sounded a little dirty…maybe its just me.)

    Ya gotta go a lot farther to cross MY dirty threshold…

  5. Look. Don’t cut off the jokes BEFORE I get a change to make them…

    Good luck!

    [insert ‘cut off’ Jewish joke here]

  6. It’s nice to get excited about the little things! Like being ambidextrous for instance. Hope it goes as planned!

    Oooh, if I could come out of this fully ambi, that would be AWESOME.

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