Because it’s fun…

I’m pressed for time, true, but even if I wasn’t I wanted to steal this quick meme from Crisitunity.  Enjoy!

***

1. You can press a button that will make any one person explode. Who would you blow up?

Karl Rove.

2. You can flip a switch that will wipe any band or musical artist out of existence. Which one will it be?

Hmm.  I dunno, even artists that grate on me have served a purpose.  I’m tempted to do something wholly heretical like say “The Beatles” or “Michael Jackson” just to see how popular music would have evolved without them.  But for now I think I’ll say “I pass.”

3. Who would you really like to just punch in the face?

Rush Limbaugh or Ann Coulter or anybody who’s actually making a living by gleefully pounding a wedge between the American people.  Yes, including liberals who do the same, although I tend to hate the right-wing fearmongers more.

4. What is your favorite cheese?

Provolone.

5. You can only have one kind of sandwich. Every sandwich ingredient known to humankind is at your immediate disposal. What kind will you make?

Hmm.  Chicken cordon bleu.  Except with endangered chickens.  Mmmm.

6. You have the opportunity to sleep with the movie celebrity of your choice. We are talking no-strings-attached sex and it can only happen once. Who is the lucky celebrity of your choice?

My obvious and immediate answer would be “Salma Hayek.”  But that “only happen once” thing – aside from being laughably impossible in and of itself – would it be better to nail somebody mediocre-looking, or at least crappy in the sack?  You know, so you wouldn’t just pine away for them every day of the rest of your life afterward?

7. You have the opportunity to sleep with the music-celebrity of your choice. Whom do you pick?

Honestly, I don’t lust after any female artists (or male, for that matter).  The one I’m most thoroughly ga-ga over is Alison Krauss, but I think she’s so angelically beautiful that I have a hard time thinking of her in a sexual way.

8. Now that you’ve slept with two different people in a row, you seem to be having an excellent day because you just came across a hundred-dollar bill on the sidewalk. Holy shit, a hundred bucks! How are you gonna spend it?

Logically I should put it toward my massive credit card debt.  If I had to blow it, I’d put it toward either a good tent for me and Boy or the $99 drum-simulator software I’ve been drooling over.

9. You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go?

Right now?  Fuck, there are no GP races going on right now!  Because that’s ideally where I’d go – to a GP race in Italy or Spain or Australia.  If I had to go right now, I’d say Australia just for the change of season, but visiting some of my blog buddies in warmer climes could be just as cool.

10. Upon arrival to the aforementioned location, you get off the plane and discover another hundred-dollar bill. Shit! Now that you are in the new location, what are you gonna do?

Go out to eat, be semi-daring and try something new and local, and order some good booze.

11. An angel appears out of Heaven and offers you a lifetime supply of the alcoholic beverage of your choice. It is…?

23-year-old Pappy Van Winkle.  If I have to name my favorite that I’ve actually been able to afford myself, Elmer T. Lee.

12. Rufus appears out of nowhere with a time-traveling phone booth. You can go anytime in the PAST. What time are you traveling to and what are you going to do when you get there?

I’d go back to the day of the infamous Jamie incident, wake myself up first thing that morning, and convince the younger me to tell her, “Fuck you, I’m worth more than that.”

13. You discover a beautiful island upon which you may build your own society. You make the rules. What is the first rule you put into place?

RESPECT SHALL BE GIVEN.

14. You have been given the opportunity to create the half-hour TV show of your own design. What is it called and what’s the premise?

It would be called “Rubber Side Down” and it would be a “Long Way Down” all about North America.

15.What is your favorite curse word?

“Fuck,” but only if I use it creatively.  Otherwise it’s just cliché.

16.One night you wake up because you heard a noise. You turn on the light to find that you are surrounded by MUMMIES. The mummies aren’t really doing anything, they’re just standing around your bed. What do you do?

Tell them that the sterile tape is in the bathroom closet.

17. Your house is on fire, holy shit! You have just enough time to run in there and grab ONE inanimate object. Don’t worry, your loved ones and pets have already made it out safely. So what’s the item?

My Fender.

18. You accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow you with the super-power of your choice! What’s it gonna be?

Telepathy.  Oh, god, that’s who you want to have sex with right now?  You are sick.

19. You can re-live any point of time in your life. The time-span can only be a half-hour, though. What half-hour of your past would you like to experience again?

It would be some portion of Dys’s first visit to see me.  Maybe around the time we had our picture taken at the roadside overlook.  Or maybe the first half-hour after she got off the plane.  (Or maybe the second half-hour?)

20.You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be?

See Jamie Incident, above.

21. The constant absorption of magical moonbeams mixed with the radioactive vegetables you consumed earlier has given you the ability to resurrect the dead famous-person of your choice. So which celebrity will you bring back to life?

Elvis Presley, so I can kill him and exhibit the body as proof that the motherfucker is dead.

22. What’s your theme song?

The last song I claimed as a “theme song” was “Hellbound” by Pantera.  The song that most inspires me of late, though, is “Odal” by Agalloch.

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2 Responses

  1. Warmer climes, eh?? Yeah, you could say that!! It’s PLENTY hot in beautiful down town Brisbane today, I can tell you that for nothing. Get your fam on the plane, TB, you’ve got somewhere to stay!!

    Enjoyed that post thoroughly, very entertaining, you is!!

    Why thankya, Ellie, for both the compliment and the invitation!

  2. Great meme…I want to use this one at a later date..if you dont mind…..my theme song would be the tune from greatest american hero……anyways great post really funny stuff here..zman sends

    OK, ZMan, thanks for comin’ by!

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