Those whom the Creature calls…

The Sausage Creature calls to all motorcyclists, after all.

I was updating the Glossary today (I’ve actually made several minor updates in the last few weeks, just nothing worth noting) and I finally did something that occurred to me several days ago. As in, light from the heavens, DUH, I should have added a note to the entry for “Ducati” that linked to Hunter S. Thompson’s infamous essay, Song of the Sausage Creature.

I hadn’t read it in a while, actually, and while re-reading it this morning I was again struck with how hilarious it is. Once I stopped laughing too hard for rational reflection, that is. Thompson was one loony puppy, and he was from adolescence probably much more of a legend in his own mind than in reality. (Reading his correspondence is illustrative.) But the man had a fantastic way with words, and the Song of the Sausage Creature is, to me, even slightly better than Fear and Loathing or another hysterical sports tale, The Kentucky Derby is Decadent and Depraved.

Some people will tell you that slow is good – and it may be, on some days – but I am here to tell you that fast is better. I’ve always believed this, in spite of the trouble it’s caused me. Being shot out of a cannon will always be better than being squeezed out of a tube. That is why God made fast motorcycles, Bubba….

“Song of the Sausage Creature” illuminates the crazy, hair-on-fire beast that lurks within most motorcyclists. Yes, what we do is sometimes ill-advised, and no matter how good we are or what we do to prepare, there’s always that possibility that around the corner lurks a truck just waiting to pull an illegal U-turn. The twin thrills of torque and speed are always dim pulls at the brain stem, daring us to the precipice. As a friend once said as a proverb, “Riding is a constant physics lesson. Beware the pop quizzes.” Motorcycling has always been and will always be a balance of risks; among those is the battle to control that atavistic throttle-thwacking animal within us. Lest we meet the Sausage Creature.

At any rate, the Song of the Sausage Creature has never been and, God willing, will never be an irresistible siren’s call to me. But goddamn, is the story funny. Rest easy, good Doctor. One day maybe I’ll buy you a bourbon in the biker dive in the sky.

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One Response

  1. Hunter was one of the few writers who could really express what it is about riding that makes us keep returning to it. He’s a huge, huge loss.

    Yep. I don’t know what it is, exactly, but he can capture an emotion about as well as anyone.

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