The Birthday Cake of Doom

*Edit:  QVC visitors, see the comment at the bottom.

In my 7.75 Candles blog, I promised pictures of the psychotically complex R2-D2 cake that my wife spent about 12 hours putting together. And when I say “putting together,” I mean it. Here’s where I come through on my promise.

Here’s photo number one, showing the component parts of the cake.

R2D2 - Nekkid

The cake was essentially a 13×9″ chocolate cake with three 9″ round yellow cakes sliced up and added. Why the two flavors? Because, silly, half the kids in his class wanted one flavor and half wanted the other. Haven’t you ever seen kids fight over dinner before?

Above you see the pieces in position. Some of the uses are obvious (rounds for the dome and the shoulders) but some are less obvious. The pieces on the barrel-body are thin slices of the yellow round cake, piled onto the body to give it a little more depth. Why? Only my wife knows why she thought of it, but you’ll see in the end product that it worked. This pic was taken as she finished placing all the pieces. Then she made up a batch of 9-goddamn-cups of buttercream frosting and used a thin layer to tack the pieces together. So if you got a piece of R2D2 body, you got a piece of chocolate cake with a thin layer of yellow cake on top, separated by a thin layer of frosting.

Here is a view of the cake once it’s starting to become more recognizable. She laid on a thin layer of white frosting to act as a base, gluing the whole thing together and holding the stars on as well. Then she broke out the frosting dyes and started to make color some small cups of frosting. I almost uploaded a pic of the massive batch of frosting she made for this endeavor, but the only pic we had of the full bowl didn’t give any scale. It was a 16″ or so diameter bowl, and the damned thing was almost full. My wife described it to her mother and I think in the process gave her a cavity over the phone.

She had my son’s Star Wars Visual Dictionary open to get the features done correctly. Sanity? Whose house do you think we’re talking about here?

Now that she had the base layer and some “flat” blue done, it was time to break out the parchment triangles and the star tips. Oh yes. You didn’t think she’d just put on some white and blue and be done, did you? Not MY wife.

That would be WAY too simple.

Now he’s all covered with white, grey, and blue stars. And you can see the added dimension that the yellow cake layered over the body added – wild, huh? Now, what could possibly be missing? We’re done, right? Oh, HELL no. Not without the cherries.

Yep. Cherry halves for the “eye” and lights. This view also shows the three dimensions very well, especially the shoulders. Click on my Flickr link over to the right if you want to see bigger pictures. It’s truly amazing.

The cake was a massive hit with everyone. Even though it contained enough sugar to do some serious damage to the uninitiated. Me, I’m a Southern boy, I’m fine. My wife, on the other hand, was raised in the dour Midwest, where they call fruit pies “sweet” and measure sugar in desserts by the teaspoon. (Pshaw.) A piece of this cake for her puts her into a deep sleep, from which she rises with strange pains in her joints. Me? Pass the Coke, honey, and do you have any chocolate chip cookies?

All in all, it was pure awesomeness, and I memorialize it here to show how much ass my wife can kick.

Cause you know, crazy people are dangerous.

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6 Responses

  1. That is a most awesome *homemade* birthday cake! Kudos to the missus!

  2. Holy crap! That has to be the best cake ever. Lots of detail.

  3. He ate the last piece of it on Monday, I think. *laugh*

  4. Uh, as best I can tell, someone from QVC has linked to this picture and apparently started something of a firestorm over there.

    It seems that the original post that linked here may have been removed by now, so I can’t really tell who said what. There are lots of similar cakes to this one, and my wife printed out some Wilton instructions she found online to use as a guide, which explains some similarities to other cake photos I’ve seen, such as this one which my wife did NOT do (notice the lining on the linked photo, and the fact that it’s flat instead of 3D – but damn, it still looks awesome, and I wish I’d had a slice!).

    I don’t know if someone on QVC is claiming this particular cake as their own or not, but my wife made this particular cake, and she doesn’t post on QVC’s forums (at least not last I heard). Just for the info of anyone who may be misled.

    Thanks to everyone who stopped by, though!

  5. That is quite possibly the most awesome thing I have ever seen. I’m not sure if I’ve even seen anything done by professional bakeries that could make something that good looking. Your wife is a cake magician!

    Several of the parents at the party said she should do this for a living. Her answer was that she could only stand to do something that maddening about once or twice a year, out of love.

  6. I agree with the other comments, this IS the best birthday cake I hav ever seen ! :0)
    My husband is turning 24 and wants an R2D2 cake and he googles it and your cake showed up, and he said ” I want this one!!” hahah! Golden, now I have quite a challenge ahead of me.. 🙂
    Wonderful cake, and thanks for the inspiration.

    Angel – glad you found it, and good luck with the cake! 🙂

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