Last weekend, Dys and I took advantage of some kid-free time to go shopping for a comforter for our bed.
Having utterly failed at doing so, we found ourselves wandering around the department store, and we spent quite a bit of time looking at, contemplating, and ultimately buying some clothes for Boy. Some clothes that we hope he thinks are as cool as we do – a t-shirt, skater button-up shirt, and a pair of cargo shorts to match.
Afterward, I was musing that hell, I wished they made clothes like that for me. And Dys said, “I’m going to go look for some pants; go over to the men’s section and look.”
Whattaya know, they did make clothes like that for men! As long as you’re not my size.
Seriously, they had mediums and larges, 31’s and 34’s, but scouring fruitlessly for a 2x shirt and 38-inch waist pants will make you rededicate to a damned weight loss routine. In the end, I did find one (and ONLY one) shirt in a 2x that I liked (it was a set, came with a tank top to wear underneath), and one (and ONLY one) pair of shorts. Score!
I got home and tried on the shirts. “Heh, I can’t even remember the last time I wore a wifebeater.”
She snickered. “I guarantee you didn’t have that much chest hair.”
I looked in the mirror. “You’re right.”
Then I tried on the pants – NUH-UH. I looked: Fuckers. It was on a 38 hanger, but they were actually 31’s. (Of course, the alternative would have been worse.)
Anyway, I made a trip to the OTHER branch of that store in town, and had no more luck. I settled for a slightly less-desirable but still fairly cool pair of shorts.
I feel a little funny when I put the clothes on, though. Kinda cool? A little over the top, perhaps? Maybe too cool for a dork like me? I can’t tell if I look like an aging skater-punk who’s trying too hard, or like the elder-statesman-at the gangsta family picnic.
Dys seems to like it. I guess I’ll take it. Hell, if we go out tonight, that’s probably what I’ll be wearing.
Filed under: A Nice Guy Speaks, Life and other states of existence
And now we will need to do photos, won’t we?
You said that already.
I was just about to say that – where’s your photographic evidence!?! It seems like a lot of women bloggers like to post pictures of what clothes they buy, (and I’ve been known to post pictures of food), so come on – give us a looksee!
She doesn’t need encouragement!
But yeah, I hate, HATE when I’m trying to find clothes for Brian and they have every size but his. I’m surprised you didn’t lose your cool over that – I probably would have.
I was a little pissed. Especially when that was the only pair that color in my size. So I returned them to their other store across town – and they didn’t have any in that color in my size, either. I had to settle for something else.
31s? Sent them bad boys MY WAY…they are usually hard to find!
Too late, dude – exchanged for something more comfy on yours truly!
What? You buy your own clothes? Todd says he got married so he doesn’t have to do that anymore.
Well, I bought my own clothes with her explicit encouragement and approval on those specific items.