Okay, well, to get away from a few downers and give you guys something to start off your weekend on a Friday afternoon, I’m gonna share one of my favoritest finds ever on the Internet.
Ladies and Gentlemenseseses, I give you: The LawDog Files.
I can’t even remember now how I found these a few years ago. I just remember that I laughed until I ached. And for some strange reason, I thought of these things in the middle of a lap in the pool yesterday and damn near drowned myself. Do you know how hard it is to keep swimming when you’re laughing?
Almost all of the stories are on the first page, but do NOT forget to go over to page 2. If you do, you’ll miss out on the odyssey of Desmond and Opal, which is my personal favorite of the bunch.
Oh, and DON’T read this if you’re in an office and busting a gut will get you in trouble. You can thank me later.
Filed under: Fun Stuff
It’s later, so, thank you!
Too funny.
My wife thought it was so funny that when her parents visited she pulled up the site and read it aloud to them. Now whenever I read it, I hear her affecting a Texas sheriff accent, and that just adds to the hilarity.
I have many friends in law enforcement, from beat cops to feds, and they always have the best stories. Well, best may not always be the proper word but they do have stories.
Most of them think they can write (most of them can’t) so I get work rewriting their stuff. I find myself often saying things like,
“Ah, are you sure you want to use this? I see problems.”
One time a homicide detective wanted to talk about something but, because he didn’t want his family to hear, we met in his backyard.
During one rather interesting exchange he jumped and reached for his gun. It was the wind blowing something but it spooked him. As he put his gun back he said,
“What I’m telling you could get me killed.”
“Oh great! You’re freaked out and you have a gun. This doesn’t sound good for me.”
Uh, yeah. I’d request the firearm be placed on the deck for the duration of the conversation. Sheesh. Paranoid much?
Holy crap, I just finished reading those posts, and my husband caught me snort laughing. I was laughing so hard I almost peed my pants.
Toldja so.
“Desmond, Opal. What’s on y’all’s minds?”
Mr. Dog definitely has a way of capitivating your attention with his stories! I followed the link in his sig to his blog. I can’t stop reading!
Thanks! Now I can’t get anything productive done until I finish reading his blog. It’s like a good book I can’t put down!
Dangit…and I was so hoping to get a few things rearranged in the house. Oh well…after I finish catching up on his blog. *sigh*
So should I say “sorry” or “you’re welcome?”
He had me at “T’aint a chicken, emu.”
Taoist: Uh, yeah. I’d request the firearm be placed on the deck for the duration of the conversation. Sheesh. Paranoid much?
The sad part is he wasn’t paranoid at all. Many of the people we discussed have been in the news lately after getting caught doing just what he was talking about.
Yikes. That’s even scarier.
Want something scarier? I have a meeting with him tonight. And he sounded very agitated.
“I don’t want to talk over the phone.”
Was an actual sentence.